I some times wonder the real meaning of friendship, is it what you give to someone in there life, or is it somthing that they give you in yours, or is it a shared, give and take? I would hope and always thought it was the last but I find this not always ture, I find as I go through my life I know less and less about the people I call my friends, I learn some things are half truths and that there are some things, big things I have every heard about befor, and I find out from someone one who I dident even know was conciderd a friend. I seem to be the go to girl the one everyone runs to when times are bad or tuff or when there is nothing todo, so somthing is needed. I am always the one bilding everyone up, telling them how great they are and yet at the end of the day I sit and ask why, I am sitting there all alone, knowing nothing about my friends and exhasted from working so hard to make the world happy. though I have to pause in the middle of this to say I have one friend who I love to death, who has been througth her fair share of tuff times and knows what its like to be "friendless" and I dont know what I would do with out her! I really have to learn to call her more and answer my phone when she calles ( I am really bad at ansewring my cell phone!) chicky pooh, I hope you know how much you mean to me!! anyway moving along....I dont expect any relationship to be rosie, nore should anyone elts, life is full of tuff times and they come and go, some being tuffer than the rest, but you would think it would not be to much to ask to have someone who would be in your life good AND bad, I have no one to share with. I have been trying to plan a trip on or around my 25ht birthday, but I can not find on person who is willing to come, many have entertaind the thougth but no one with say yes to comming with me, thanks guys! you wont even go on vacation with me! you know is it so much to ask to have someone tell you there going to apply to go to school and that they might quit the job you fought, pushed and pulled to get them. I little notice would have been great, finding out from someone elts, not so great! and I could go on and on that is just one example, I am not frustrated not at all! ! !
Thought I also have to say that while I offten 6ask god why I have peopel in my life that treat me like this, I often....rather always thank him for so meny things, I have 3 great girls I get to spend time with and mentor every month and its great, its so fun seeing them grow with god and with earch other, becoming friends in a way I could only hope for, I thank god for my family and how close we are and for all the things I have been able to do in my life. I have so meny questions I wish I could sit and have a coffee with god and get some answers but its not that easy and in a way I am glad, in other ways it hurts, but its all for a reson. and for that I am greatful. well I have unloaded for a day and now I must go...but I promis to update much more offten, thanks for the vent.. ciao
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Hello cherished friend,
Life does just suck sometimes doesn't it? It's so great that our value is not found in people, but in God. He loves us so much....and that makes me able to love you so much! You have found a faithful and loyal friend in me dearest. To the very end! And yes, thank God for family!oh, and....answer your friggin' phone! luv, luv, luv!!!
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